GUUUUUURL of the Day: Jared Leto's Browless Ass

via huffpo

Ho-leeee mother eff, you guys. What in hairless cat face hell happened to Jordan Catalano?

Jared Leto and a friend on their way to lunch.

I know that this sh*t is for a movie, but get this b some brow toupees or something, man. I can't be having that mess all shoved up in my eyeballs. It's freaking me out.

Jared is usually a stone cold ass fox, so this is some harsh crap. I will donate my hair to make this man some emergency brows, if need be. I AM FRIGHTENED. What the eff would Rickie say about this?

Oh. Well, Rickie's too busy being hot to worry about Jordan/Jared's eyebrow game. But you know who's not? My ass.

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An Open Plea to Whoever is Doing Muh Boo, Brit Brit's Makeup.

Let me start by saying this -- I am a ride or die Britney Spears fan. I will cut a b if she talks trash about my boo. So this hurts, but it comes from a good place. I caught Brit on X Factor (don't ask) the other night, and this is what I saw on my 19" TV/VCR combo set.

And this is why I need some contact info on whoever is doing my homegirl's makeup. WHERE ARE YOUR EYEBROWS, MIZZ SPEARS??? I have a suspicion that Britney has been bleaching her brows for the past several years. Because this is what they used to look like.

Hey, there. You look approximately 29384032984 times better with some eyebrows on your damn face, baby. Just lemme pencil them in. Just the tip (of the brow pencil). And please, please take of the choker/thin chain necklaces. We've been trying this look since the dark days of Brit Bootgate in '07.

 Remember those cloven beasts straight from Hell that she wore EVERY DAMN DAY? Okay, okay. I need to calm down. Just let the nice makeup people pencil your eyebrows in. I'm so proud of your ass, though. You're doing great, boo boo.




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I'm a Douche...

I made an eyebrow tutorial video. It's my first one, so I kind of suck. Get your tomatoes ready...

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